John Ashley

Forward

Writing a personal statement was one of the hardest things I’ve ever written. It requires a lot of introspection to tell the story of why you are pursuing medicine. After 12 drafts and the help of my family, I finally came up with something I felt was pretty good, at least something good enough to get me accepted to medical school.

I hope you enjoy it, and if you are applying also applying to medical school, I hope it helps.

Essay

6/11/2022

My first experience with medicine came as a kindergartner. After three days of not eating and brutal abdominal pain, I refused the cheese pizza my mother put in front of me. On a typical day, I was the monster that cheese pizza would see in its nightmares, so my pain and actions were unusual enough that my mom took me to the ER. After a CT scan, I was diagnosed with a congenital malrotation of the gut, a condition that required an emergent procedure. 

After being cut open and having my guts rearranged, even small things like walking around the hospital caused me excruciating pain. The 6-year-old me was not very thankful to have needed surgery, but as time passed, I got healthier and was able to return to my everyday life. I now appreciate how lucky I am to have been born into an era with modern medicine. Thanks to the performance of an excellent medical team, I was not subjected to the terrible infection and death that would have befallen me 200 years ago. 

The positive impact that my hospital team had on me is immeasurable. Their genuine concern for my well-being, paired with meticulous execution of my care, I feel made a dramatic difference in my recovery. Their ability to save me and countless others represents the best of what medicine has to provide: a gift of a healthier, longer life. By becoming a physician, I aspire to achieve the same level of competence exhibited by those responsible for my care. I hope to make the same difference for someone that my hospital team made for me.

The desire to directly make a difference in peoples’ lives drew me from engineering to medicine. As a physician, my work will have a meaningful impact on individuals in need. By entering medicine, my work will be more important than just showing up. The opportunity to improve patients’ lives became particularly clear when I started volunteering in the children’s hospital.

As a volunteer, I began playfully describing my role as the “best job in the hospital” because I got to play with kids and did not have the paperwork that burdened everyone else. Despite the pink walls and energetic staff, kids in the hospital often have a hard time having fun. When I found a kid who was feeling down, I enjoyed reminding them it is ok to let loose by playing games, reading children’s books, chatting about movies, thinking mischievously, or doing anything obnoxious that came to mind. While I was not medically helping kids as a volunteer, I enjoyed brightening their everyday moods. 

For Brady, a reserved 14-year-old with B-cell Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia, we broke through the awkward volunteer-patient etiquette and formed an especially close relationship. Our friendship surprised the staff because he and his mom usually did not like visitors. Although the staff found him standoffish, I liked Brady’s blunt sense of humor and related to some of his challenges of being a young man.

One night, Brady asked if I wanted to see his guitars and was delighted to learn that I had been playing for a few years. I realized he didn’t know any songs, so I showed him how to play “Seven Nation Army” by The White Stripes, a famous but simple song that only requires one string to play. We had a good time that night, and I told him I looked forward to seeing his progress next week. When I returned, I was caught off guard when I learned he had lost his battle with leukemia. Later, the hospital’s music therapist told me about how proud he was to be able to play a song on the guitar.  Even though our time together was cut short, I felt I was able to ameliorate the problems tormenting him. Although what I did was limited in many ways, my impact on Brady felt meaningful.

After Brady passed, I spent a lot of time reflecting on what he must have felt while his health spiraled downward. At some point, he realized that our medical system was not going to save him. He must have been told optimistically about a 5-year survival rate of 70 percent for his condition, but it would mean nothing as he would fall into the unfortunate 30 percent. As his disease progressed, he understood that he would never get the opportunity to live out his dream of becoming a policeman. For him, his unfair reality was that he was going to die at the age of 14. 

It was a humbling experience to be Brady’s friend. His passing points out the reality of medicine’s limitations. However, the chance to serve patients like him makes me want to become a physician. By seeing much of myself in Brady, I learned to be more empathetic for those plagued by failing health. As our health declines, our interventions become less effective, but our attachment to life remains despite the reality of our mortality. It is these people, in their moment of suffering, who need us the most. 

While it is demanding and challenging to care for the very sick and dying population, the pursuit of caring for and comforting patients is purposeful. The call to action to heal my patients makes me confident I am pursuing the right path. I know I will have more challenging cases like Brady, but I am ready to do what I can for those who face grim circumstances. I believe my experiences have prepared me for the challenges ahead in serving my patients and, in turn, prepared me to contribute to my local community.